Yes Marks The Spot

Ten years ago, today I said, "YES! YES! YES! Absolutely, YES!"

The day before, I had left my home in DC to fly cross country to join Gary on our new life together. I remember feeling at peace and giddy with excitement and a little bit nervous at the new adventure in front of me.

A month prior, we had driven cross country in Brutus, our Budget moving truck with all of our belongings, minus an air mattress and a few weeks' worth of my clothes from DC to Santa Clara, CA. A westward expedition to strike out on our own, new journey.  It was interrupted for a bit because for six weeks, from the end of June to August 13th, we'd had to live separately because I had a big work event that didn't make it possible for me to stay following our road trip. So, after spending 5 days crossing the country; and one night helping unpack, with a heavy heart I returned to DC for a month, and lived in my empty room, as Gary set up our apartment in Santa Clara solo.

Over the summer of separation, we'd had the opportunity to meet up a couple of times. First in southern California for Scott and Claire's wedding; and then in Milwaukee for SummerFest and the National Wellness Conference. But, it was a long six weeks to be literally coasts apart.

The first piece of excitement on starting this new adventure with Gary was that I was stoked to surprise him for his birthday by planning a fun weekend in Santa Cruz. I'm the worst at keeping surprises; so I'd clued him into the location; but not to what all I'd had planned. Little did I know that the tables would be turned, and I'd be the one being surprised.

After I landed, we drove to Santa Cruz, and spent the day walking along the boardwalk, checking out the shops, riding rides, and being treated to some of the best people watching there is. For dinner that night, we went to an Italian restaurant on the pier. I don't remember what it was called. I just remember that I'd eaten A TON and we christened our citizenship by drinking copious amounts of wine as Californians should.

We weren't staying far from the pier, definitely within walking distance; and after dinner I really just wanted to literally roll back to our room. Gary wanted to go for a walk; and tried a couple of times to persuade me to go for a stroll, and walk off dinner. It was totally uncharacteristic of me to not want to walk....and not at all like Gary to want to go for a walk, so we went back to the hotel, with me promising that first thing in the morning, we'd wake up and go walking.

The Spot Where It All Happened

The next morning, we got up and walked out away from the Boardwalk, beyond the lighthouse along the trail; and sat at a bench overlooking the dog beach. Dogs were romping in the surf, whales were sporadically surfacing; and it was so awesome to just be in this absolutely unique and quirky place, surrounded by the ocean. All of a sudden, Gary stopped mid-conversation and grabbed my hand....and I don't really even remember everything he said, but, he fumbled around in the pocket of his cargo shorts with a huge box....that I can't believe that I hadn't noticed. I think I was equally shocked by the moment and the brightness of the bling, that even before he'd finished asking me to marry him, I was wrapping my arms tightly around him, and saying, ""YES! YES! YES! Absolutely, YES!"

It was definitely a surprise. In the year and almost a half that we'd been dating up to that point, we hadn't seriously talked about marriage. More like alluded to a life together. We knew we wanted to be together; but I'd never said how I wanted to be proposed to (not that I had a plan); or what kind of ring I wanted (I hadn't put any thought into that either, other than the fact that I'm naturally attracted to shiny things). I had though, spent a hot minute lingering over a Tacori ad months prior to that, and mentioned that I'd really loved a ring like that. And, I didn't expect just because we were moving across the country together that that meant that we had to get married; or expected him to propose. It was more of a deep sense of knowing that we would be married, without knowing when/how/why. It was just a soul truth. But it unfolded perfectly, because I LOVE surprises. So it was awesome!!!

Ever the inquiring mind, I had a million questions to ask him about his planning process and how he knew he wanted to propose to me? And, how he picked out my ring? And, did he ask my dad? And, was he nervous? And, how long had he been planning?

Turns out that I'd inadvertently put the kibosh on his original plan of proposing at sunset the previous evening through my gluttony and not wanting to go for a walk (my words, not his). :) And, he had been planning for quite awhile. He had originally intended to propose to me in early June in DC prior to us moving. But, Paul had proposed to Amy right in that time frame; and Gary didn't want to take away from that. So, he waited. He hadn't asked my dad. He was nervous, not that I would say no; but nervous in that he wanted it to be memorable and special (as if?!)

A decade ago...it blows me away. It simultaneously feels like a lifetime ago in many respects (faded memories, 7 apartments/townhouses/house and new state of residency later, closeness and distance w/ebbs and flows) I feel like a completely different person from the me I was at 25. Yet, in other ways it feels just like yesterday. (I can still feel the ocean breeze blowing in my hair. The warmth of the sun on my face and feel the tears prickle in my eyes as we kissed after he put the ring on me.The eagerness of being in a new place with the world ahead of us.)