Most sessions, I'm able to completely relax into the deepest naps possible. It's divine sleep, really. I wish that I'd started writing about each of my experiences, b/c every one of them is slightly different. Today's though...O.M.G. it was slightly terrifying and exhilarting in the same way that riding a monster roller coaster is.
Everything started out well and good. Because of the holidays, I hadn't been to a session in about 3 weeks, so I was expecting my body to be sensitive to the needles; and it wasn't too bad. The acupuncturist told me that my pulse was actually pretty relaxed (according to him, all of my previous pulse readings have been akin to those of a pregnant woman)...but, today I was relaxed. I always laugh at that; b/c by nature, I have an incredibly slow resting heart rate. Even when I'm not training for a race, it's just super slow.
Anyway, I was feeling relaxed and just settled into the flow of letting my worries and stresses go, and completely melting into the table. I could feel my aura floating around me. I was aware of my energy field; and felt orbs of spinning energy in my palms and on the bottoms of my feet. As I lay face down, I drifted in and out of sleep, feeling very much like the giant Snoopy balloon winding it's way hovering above the street during the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. Or, as if I was floating face down in cerulean water, casting a shadow along the sandy white bottom.
It's not uncommon to be completely relaxed and then out of nowhere have a needle start making some noise in that it gets uncomfortable. That's supposed to be energy needing to make its way out. You're told to breathe through it and let it pass. Today's though, I started feeling a charlie horse like ache in my heart center. That's not uncommon. Sometimes I get cramps in my chest area, and it passes. It's usually while sitting on the couch watching tv. But, as I breathed into the cramping, my left side arm and leg started numbing and my palms got incredibly hot and sweaty. I rang the doorbell Dr. Bill had put in my hand (which is brilliant for acupuncturists to provide for their patients); and I felt like I was going to throw up. The pain in my chest expanded and built and I wanted to push the button again and again....luckily, he came in quickly and I jaggedly told him what I was experiencing.
He said, "Oh you're probably just having another panic attack." And, I was like "What? I don't get them." And, he's an interesting man and jokingly said, "Well, why not? You should!" To alleviate the tension. He removed the needles and I could feel the blood flowing back into my arm and leg and the cramping start to dissipate. He suggested that after he leave that I get up very slowly and stretch out, opening my chest, b/c he suspected he'd opened up some heart energy.
That turned out to be an understatement. As soon as he left the room, I began bawling. Absolutely sobbing, tears running down my cheeks, waterworks central. I curled up into child's pose on top of the table and just wept uncontrollably. I took my time getting dressed, and sat in the chair, hugging my knees to my chest. I really didn't want him to come in the room and find me going through the entire box of tissues. But, I didn't want to hold in what obviously wanted to be released. And, I know from other acupuncture experiences and talking with friends, that sometimes acupuncture and energy work opens up blocks in ways you don't expect...so, it's gotta be something he's dealt with before. After I had my cry and wiped the errant mascara rivulets from my eyes, I slowly made my way out of the room.
It's truly like leaving one portal and going into another after an acupuncture session. Especially one as intense as the one I just had. He asked me if I'd felt any popping or cracking in my chest area; and I hadn't. But, I definitely left feeling different. Feeling like I'd opened myself up to more caring, more love, more tenderness.
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